The short answer: expatriates are people who live outside their country of citizenship, usually for years rather than weeks and usually by choice: for a job, studies, a partner, retirement or simply a better quality of life. The word comes from the Latin ex (out of) and patria (homeland). Most expatriates discover the same thing within a few months of moving: the paperwork is hard, but building a social life from zero is harder. This guide explains who expatriates are, the main types, and a practical plan for making real friends once you’ve arrived.
I’ve moved countries twice. The first time I thought being an expatriate meant a new flat, a new job and weekend trips. Nobody told me that the quiet Sunday afternoons would be the real test. The second time I planned my social life as carefully as my visa, and it made all the difference. Everything below is what I wish I’d known the first time.
What expatriates means (and what it doesn’t)
In everyday English, an expatriate (or “expat”) is someone living in a country that isn’t their own. The term is most often used for people who moved for professional reasons, such as a company transfer, but today it is used far more broadly: freelancers, remote workers, students, retirees and people who followed a partner all call themselves expats.
The word has a sensitive side. Many people point out that “expatriate” tends to be used for wealthier, often Western, movers, while “immigrant” or “migrant” is used for others doing exactly the same thing. Dictionaries treat the words as overlapping: an expatriate usually expects to go home or move on eventually, while an immigrant usually intends to settle. In practice the line is blurry. Plenty of “temporary” expats stay twenty years, and plenty of “permanent” immigrants leave after two.
On this site we use “expat” for anyone who has moved abroad and is building a life there, whatever their passport, income or plans. What matters here is not the label but the shared experience: arriving somewhere new, knowing nobody, and having to build a circle from scratch.
The main types of expatriates
Expatriates are not one group. Your type shapes where you’ll meet people and what gets in the way. Most people fit one or two of these:
| Type | Typical situation | Social advantage | Social challenge |
|---|---|---|---|
| Corporate assignee | Sent abroad by an employer, often for 2–5 years | Colleagues from day one, sometimes relocation support | Work-only circle; long hours; knowing the stay is temporary |
| Self-initiated expat | Found a job abroad independently | Chose the city, often motivated to integrate | No support network, everything starts from zero |
| Remote worker or digital nomad | Works online for clients or an employer elsewhere | Flexible time for daytime activities | No colleagues at all; frequent moves |
| Student | Exchange, degree or language school abroad | Built-in events, classes and societies | Bubble of other internationals; short stays |
| Trailing partner | Moved for a partner’s job | Often time to explore and join things | Loss of own career and identity; isolation at home |
| Retiree | Moved for climate, cost of living or family | Plenty of time, often established clubs for retirees | Language barrier; fewer natural meeting points |
If you followed someone else’s job, our guide for the trailing spouse making friends abroad goes deeper into that particular kind of loneliness, which is very real and rarely talked about.
How many expatriates are there?
Nobody counts expatriates as a category, because there is no legal definition of one. The best available proxy is the United Nations estimate of international migrants: people living outside their country of birth or citizenship. According to the UN’s International Migrant Stock 2024, there were about 304 million international migrants in mid-2024, roughly 3.7 per cent of the world’s population and about double the number in 1990.
That figure includes refugees, labour migrants and long-settled immigrants as well as people who would call themselves expats, so it is a ceiling rather than a count. The practical takeaway is simpler: in almost any large European city, there are thousands of people who arrived recently, know few people and would quite like a friend. You are far from the only one.
Why making friends is hard for expatriates
Almost every expatriate I know has a version of the same story: a busy, exciting first month, then a sudden drop when the novelty wears off and the calendar is empty. There are a few clear reasons for it.
- You lose your structures. At home, friendships were held together by school, university, family, old colleagues and familiar places. Abroad, all of that disappears at once.
- Locals are already full. Most adults have a settled circle and limited free time. They aren’t unfriendly; they just aren’t looking.
- Other expats leave. Expat friendships can be intense and fast, but people move on. Many long-term expats describe a cycle of goodbyes every summer.
- Language and norms. Even with good English around you, jokes, invitations and small talk follow different rules. It’s tiring, and tiredness makes staying in tempting.
- Friendship takes time. Close friendships usually grow from repeated contact with the same people. One great night out rarely becomes a friendship unless you see that person again and again.
If you’re in the low patch right now, you’re not doing anything wrong. Our guide to expat loneliness and why it hits explains what’s going on, and what tends to help.
Where expatriates actually meet people
The most reliable way to make friends abroad is to join something that repeats. The same people, the same place, every week. Here are the options that work best for most expatriates, roughly in order of how quickly they create repeat contact:
1. Weekly clubs and teams
Running clubs, five-a-side football, climbing gyms, choirs, book clubs and amateur theatre all meet on a schedule. After three or four sessions, people start to recognise you. That recognition is where friendship begins.
2. Language exchanges and classes
A language class gives you a group of other newcomers who are also motivated to socialise. Language exchange nights mix expats and locals, which is one of the easiest bridges to local friends.
3. Expat communities and networks
Networks like InterNations, Facebook groups and WhatsApp communities are useful in the first weeks to get a feel for a city. See our round-up of the best expat communities in Europe for where to start.
4. Work and coworking
Colleagues are an obvious starting point, especially for corporate assignees. Suggest a lunch or an after-work drink early, before everyone settles into routines. If you work remotely, a coworking space with community events can replace an office.
5. Volunteering
Volunteering puts you alongside locals working towards something together, which is one of the most natural ways to talk without forced small talk.
6. Small plans with people nearby
Sometimes the easiest step is the smallest: a dinner, a game night, a walk. Inviting two or three people to something specific is far less awkward than asking someone to “hang out sometime”.
A four-week plan for new expatriates
This is the plan I used the second time I moved. It assumes you have a job or studies and about two or three free evenings a week. Adjust the details to your city.
| Week | Goal | What to do |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Map the options | Join two local expat groups online, list three weekly activities you’d enjoy, and go to one of them. Say yes to every work lunch. |
| 2 | Commit to repeats | Go back to the same activity. Add a language exchange or class. Learn two names and use them. |
| 3 | Make the first invitation | Invite one or two people you’ve met twice to something specific: a coffee after the session, a market, a film. |
| 4 | Host something small | Organise a simple plan for three to five people. A dinner, a picnic or a game night. Ask each person to bring one other person. |
After four weeks you won’t have best friends, but you’ll have a handful of familiar faces and a weekly rhythm. That’s exactly where you want to be. Keep going for another two months and the circle starts to hold itself together. For a longer timeline, our 90-day social plan for moving abroad alone breaks the first three months down week by week.
Messages to copy
Invitations are the hardest part for most expatriates, because they feel risky. Specific invitations get far more yeses than vague ones. Copy, tweak and send:
- After a club session: “A few of us are getting a coffee after the run on Saturday. Want to come along?”
- To a colleague: “I’m still finding my way around. Do you know a good lunch place near the office? Want to try it on Thursday?”
- To someone from a language exchange: “That was fun. There’s a food market on Sunday morning near the station. Fancy going and practising a bit more?”
- To a small group: “I’m cooking on Friday at 8 and inviting a few people I’ve met recently. Nothing fancy. Would you like to come, and feel free to bring someone.”
If you want more lines, our guide on how to make friends abroad has a full set of scripts for each stage, from first chat to regular plans.
Expats or locals? Aim for both
Many expatriates end up with a circle made entirely of other foreigners. That’s not a failure (our expat friendship tips cover how to make those friendships last): other expats understand what you’re going through and are often the most open to new friends. But a circle of only expats can feel fragile, because people keep leaving, and it can keep the city at arm’s length.
Local friends tend to come more slowly, through repeated, shared activities rather than parties. Learning even basic phrases of the language helps enormously, because it signals that you’re staying. If you’ve noticed that everyone you know is also from abroad, our guide to getting out of the expat bubble has practical routines for widening your circle.
Common mistakes expatriates make
- Waiting to feel settled first. The flat, the bank account and the residence card will take weeks. Don’t put your social life on hold until they’re done.
- Trying something once. One visit to a club tells you almost nothing. Go three times before deciding.
- Only going to big events. Large expat mixers are good for numbers but poor for depth. Small groups are where friendships grow.
- Never inviting. Most people are waiting for someone else to suggest a plan. Be that person.
- Comparing with home. Your friends back home took years. Give your new circle a fair chance.
What it actually feels like
The honest version: the first months as an expatriate are a mix of excitement and flatness. You’ll have brilliant evenings and weekends where you talk to nobody but the person at the bakery. Both are normal. Around the third or fourth month, many people notice a shift. You recognise people in the street, someone texts you first, and your weekends start to fill without effort. That moment is worth working towards.
Want to turn this into an actual plan? MeetNow is a free app for meeting people in person: a host posts a plan at a public place, says who pays (host pays, split, pay your own or free) and picks who joins. It is live on the web now, starting in Malta: open MeetNow in your browser and see the plans posted in Malta. (MeetNow is our own app.)
Safety box
- Meet new people in busy public places, especially the first few times.
- Tell a friend or colleague where you’re going and who you’re meeting.
- Sort your own way home and keep your phone charged.
- Don’t share your home address or financial details with people you’ve just met.
- Leave if anything feels uncomfortable; you don’t owe anyone an explanation.
Frequently asked questions (FAQ)
What does expatriates mean?
Expatriates are people who live outside their country of citizenship, usually for a period of years and usually by choice, often for work, study, retirement or a partner. The word comes from the Latin ex (out of) and patria (homeland).
What is the difference between an expatriate and an immigrant?
Dictionaries treat them as overlapping. Expatriate usually suggests someone who expects to return home or move on, while immigrant suggests someone settling permanently. Many people argue the two words should be used more evenly, and this guide uses expat for anyone who has moved abroad.
How many expatriates are there in the world?
There is no official count of expatriates as such. The closest figure is the UN estimate of 304 million international migrants in mid-2024, about 3.7 per cent of the world population, which includes everyone living outside their country of birth or citizenship.
Why is it hard for expatriates to make friends?
Adults abroad lose the ready-made structures of school, family and old routines, locals already have full social lives, and other expats often move on. Friendship needs repeated contact over time, so it takes deliberate, regular effort for several months.
Should expatriates make friends with locals or other expats?
Both. Other expats understand the move and are easy to meet early on, while local friends help you learn the language and feel at home. A healthy mix is the goal, built through regular activities you would enjoy anyway.
How long does it take expatriates to feel settled?
It varies, but many people describe the first three to six months as the hardest and feel more at home after the first year. Having a weekly routine with the same people tends to shorten that adjustment period.
