The short answer: the best conversation starters for expats are short, specific and about the situation you share: the event you are both at, the neighbourhood, the class, the city you are both learning. Ask an easy question, add one small detail about yourself, then follow up on what the other person says. Below are 60 lines grouped by setting, worked dialogues, a cultural do’s-and-don’ts box and a four-week plan to make starting conversations feel natural.
When I first moved abroad, I had plenty of things to say and no idea how to start saying them. I would stand next to someone at a language exchange, rehearse an opening line in my head, and by the time I was ready they had walked off. What changed things was having a small set of ready-made openers for the places I actually went, plus the understanding that the opener barely matters: it just has to be friendly and easy to answer. The real conversation comes from the follow-up. This guide gives you both.
Conversation starters for expats: the simple formula
Almost every good opener follows the same three steps:
- Notice something shared. The event, the place, the weather, the queue, the class, the city.
- Ask an easy question about it. One that anyone can answer without thinking hard.
- Offer a small detail about yourself. This makes it a conversation, not an interview.
Example: “Is this your first time at this exchange? It’s mine. I moved here from Manchester in September.” Shared situation, easy question, small detail. Then listen and ask a follow-up about whatever they say.
For the body language and positioning that make people more likely to talk to you in the first place, see our guide on how to be more approachable.
60 conversation starters for expats, by setting
At a language exchange (1–10)
- “Is this your first time here? It’s mine.”
- “Which language are you practising?”
- “How long have you been learning?”
- “What made you choose that language?”
- “Do you come every week? I’m looking for a regular one.”
- “What’s the hardest word you’ve had to learn?”
- “Have you ever lived in a country where they speak it?”
- “Can I practise my [language] with you for five minutes, then switch?”
- “How do you say this in [language]? I always get it wrong.”
- “Is there anywhere you’d recommend to practise outside these evenings?”
Want a weekly exchange? Our city guides cover verified exchanges in Paris, Berlin, Lisbon, Amsterdam and Dublin, and our guide to finding a tandem partner in person explains one-to-one swaps.
With neighbours (11–20)
- “Hi, I’ve just moved into number four. I’m [name].”
- “How long have you lived in the building?”
- “Do you know a good bakery around here?”
- “Which day do the bins go out? I’m still working it out.”
- “Is the market on Saturdays worth going to?”
- “Your plants are amazing. Do they like this balcony?”
- “Is it always this quiet at weekends?”
- “Do you know if there’s a neighbourhood group or festival?”
- “I’m still learning [language], sorry if I’m slow!”
- “If you ever need anything while you’re away, I’m happy to help.”
At work or in a class (21–30)
- “Where do people usually go for lunch?”
- “How long have you been on this team?”
- “What’s one thing you wish you’d known in your first month here?”
- “Any plans for the weekend?”
- “How was your weekend? Did you do anything fun?”
- “I’m still exploring the city. Where do you like to go?”
- “Is the Friday drinks thing something people actually go to?”
- “Did you grow up here, or did you move too?”
- “That presentation was great. How did you get into that area?”
- “I’m getting a coffee, want one?”
Turning colleagues into friends takes a few extra steps; see our guide on how to make friends at work abroad.
At clubs, gyms and sports (31–40)
- “How long have you been coming here?”
- “Is this group good for beginners?”
- “Which route or pace do you usually do?”
- “Do people go for a drink or coffee afterwards?”
- “Have you done any races or tournaments here?”
- “Any tips for this move? I keep getting it wrong.”
- “Is it always this busy on Tuesdays?”
- “How did you find out about this club?”
- “Do you train anywhere else during the week?”
- “Same time next week?”
At events, bars and parties (41–50)
- “How do you know the host?”
- “What brought you to this event?”
- “Have you been to one of these before?”
- “Do you live nearby?”
- “What’s the best thing you’ve discovered in this city?”
- “How long have you been here?”
- “What do you miss most from home?”
- “Any good trips you’d recommend from here?”
- “This music is great. Do you know who it is?”
- “I’m [name], by the way. I don’t think we’ve met.”
With locals, in their language (51–60)
Even simple phrases in the local language open doors. Here are some in Spanish, French, German, Italian and Portuguese.
- Spanish: “¿Eres de aquí?” (Are you from here?)
- Spanish: “¿Qué me recomiendas hacer este fin de semana?” (What would you recommend doing this weekend?)
- French: “Vous êtes d’ici ?” (Are you from here?) Use tu with younger people in relaxed settings.
- French: “C’est ma première fois ici.” (It’s my first time here.)
- German: “Wohnst du schon lange hier?” (Have you lived here long?)
- German: “Kannst du mir ein gutes Café empfehlen?” (Can you recommend a good café?)
- Italian: “Sei di qui?” (Are you from here?)
- Italian: “Che cosa mi consigli di vedere in città?” (What do you recommend I see in the city?)
- Portuguese: “É daqui?” (Are you from here?)
- Portuguese: “Qual é o teu sítio preferido na cidade?” (What’s your favourite place in the city?)
How to keep a conversation going
Openers get you in; follow-ups keep you there. Three techniques do most of the work:
- Ask “what” and “how” questions. “What do you like about living here?” invites a story; “Do you like it here?” invites “yes”.
- Pick up on a detail. If someone mentions they moved from Porto, ask what they miss about it, or what surprised them most here.
- Share a little in return. After two questions, offer something about yourself. Conversations are a back-and-forth, not an interview.
Topics that work almost everywhere
- Food: favourite local dishes, markets, restaurants, what people cook at home.
- The city: neighbourhoods, hidden spots, weekend trips.
- Travel: where people have been, where they want to go.
- Language: funny mistakes, words that do not translate.
- Hobbies: sports, music, films, books, series.
Small talk in another culture: do’s and don’ts
For a deeper look at building friendships with locals specifically, see our guide to making friends with locals abroad.
Worked dialogues
At a language exchange
You: “Hi, is this your first time here? It’s mine.”
Them: “No, I come most weeks. I’m practising English.”
You: “Nice. I’m trying to get my Portuguese beyond ordering coffee. How long have you been coming?”
Them: “About six months. It’s a good group.”
You: “Is there anywhere people go afterwards? I’m still finding my way around.”
Them: “Some of us go to a bar round the corner. Come along.”
With a neighbour
You: “Hi, I’m Sam, I just moved into the second floor.”
Them: “Welcome! I’m Ana. How are you finding it?”
You: “Good, but I haven’t found a decent bakery yet. Any tips?”
Them: “The one on the corner is the best. Go early on Saturdays.”
You: “Brilliant, thank you. If you ever need a plant watered while you’re away, just knock.”
At a running club
You: “Is this pace group good for beginners?”
Them: “Yes, we go slow. First time?”
You: “Yes, I moved here a month ago. Do people hang around afterwards?”
Them: “Usually coffee at the café by the park.”
You: “Great, I’ll join. I’m Alex, by the way.”
From first conversation to friendship
A good conversation is a beginning, not an end. Before you part, make it easy to meet again:
- “Are you coming next week?”
- “Shall we swap numbers? I’d love that bakery tip in writing.”
- “I’m going to the market on Saturday, want to come?”
Then follow up within a few days. For the full step-by-step plan, see our guide on how to make friends abroad.
A 4-week practice plan
- Week 1: three openers a day. Use one easy line with a shopkeeper, a neighbour and a colleague or classmate every day. Keep it short.
- Week 2: one follow-up. At one group event, start a conversation and ask at least two follow-up questions before moving on.
- Week 3: the local language. Use two lines from the local-language list every day, even if the other person replies in English.
- Week 4: the next step. End at least two conversations with a specific suggestion to meet again.
Keep a note on your phone of lines that worked and what people said. It helps you remember names and builds confidence fast.
Common mistakes
- Over-preparing. A simple opener said now beats a perfect one never said.
- Interviewing. Five questions in a row with no sharing feels like an interrogation.
- Talking only about the move. It is a great topic, but not the only one.
- Giving up after one awkward exchange. Some conversations fizzle. That is normal; try the next one.
Want to turn this into an actual plan? MeetNow is a free app for meeting people in person: a host posts a plan at a public place, says who pays (host pays, split, pay your own or free) and picks who joins. It is live on the web now, starting in Malta, with the phone apps on the way: open MeetNow and see the plans near you. (MeetNow is our own app.)
FAQ: conversation starters for expats
What are good conversation starters for expats?
Short, easy questions about something you share: “Is this your first time here?”, “How long have you lived in the building?”, “Where do people go for lunch?” Add a small detail about yourself and ask a follow-up.
How do I start a conversation with locals abroad?
Greet properly, use a simple phrase in the local language if you can, and ask for a recommendation: a café, a market, a weekend trip. People enjoy sharing their city.
What topics should I avoid in small talk abroad?
Avoid salary, money, politics and religion with people you have just met, and do not constantly compare everything to home. Food, the city, travel and hobbies are safe in most places.
How do I keep a conversation going?
Ask open “what” and “how” questions, pick up on details the other person mentions, and share something about yourself after a couple of questions.
What if my language skills are basic?
Say so with a smile (“I’m still learning!”) and keep sentences simple. Most people appreciate the effort and will slow down or help you.
How do I turn a conversation into a friendship?
Before you part, suggest meeting again: “Same time next week?” or a specific plan like a market visit. Swap numbers and follow up within a few days.
